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2006

Or - T'was the month before Christmas and Stocklinch needed an environmentally friendly,
politically correct, ozone positive, safety-conscious, greenhouse aware,
re-cyclable, ethnically broad and gender neutral panto!

	Puds, glorious puds, there's nothing quite like 'em!


	Turkey for 60 please!
		One of Ms Hubbard's many children!
"Ladies and Gentlemen, take your seat, the show can begin ..."
Cast List Narrator Father Christmas Alad-ette Cinder-fella Robin Hoodie Little Red Hoodie Captain Hook Jack and his Organic Beanstalk Ms Hubbard The Inspector 4 Elfs	Who is this dashing moustached Narrator?	"In the run-up to Christmas, so you're Panto's not wrecked, You'll have to write stuff that's Politically Correct! Santa's own workers can no longer be Elves, but 'Vertically Challenged' they must call themselves. New Labour's conditions for work at North Pole Are said by the Unions to stifle the soul. At the very beginning of our brand new show, Aladdin and Cinders are cross dressers, you know….."
Alad-ette & Cinder-fella	Robin Hoodie wore dark glasses so he didn't have to see his legs.....	..... Little Red Hoodie was is shock after seeing them!!
Jack, but where's his bucket full of ewe-wee?		What's that climbing up Terry's leg?? (No, we don't want to know!)
	The Stars of the Show
"The fact is that Santa has fallen foul of all the regulations…. Four reindeer have vanished, without much propriety, released to the wilds by the Humane Society. And Equal Employment had made it quite clear, that Santa had better not use JUST reindeer. So Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid, were replaced by four sheep - and you know that looks stupid!"	Seen him before???	"On top of the reindeer equal opportunities issue, Santa is having more problems… The runners have now been removed from his sleigh; The ruts were termed dangerous by those with a say And people had started to call for the cops When they heard his sledge noises on their roof-tops His second-hand pipe-smoke had his helpers quite frightened and his red fur-trimmed suit was called 'un-enlightened'."
WATCH THE BUCKET!!		The show became even more 'patchy' when Hook appeared.
	Jack's upright stalk!
	Jack takes his hat off to Ms Hubbard.
	Terry wondered where the bristles from his toothbrush had gone!!
"Santa's problems were quite clear And as for the gifts, why, he'd ne'er had a notion That making a choice could cause so much commotion Nothing of leather, nothing of fur Which means nothing for him. And nothing for her Nothing that might mean building extensions without greenhouse friendly or ethnic intentions. Nothing that uses up carbon emmissions. Use ponies instead for your expeditions."	Its him, its him. Oh no it isn't - oh yes it is!!!	"So, Stoney Lane lights will now have to go Your Christmas tree bulbs must only just glow. It is only admissable that gifts in Stocklinch Be Politically Correct - he can't give an inch. For the Flowers, no longer a cruise on the ocean, But a carbon-free walk, with no need for sun lotion. Both of the Mossops must give up the Rhine And just sit outside to enjoy the moonshine."
Well that's a fantastic idea, why didn't you all think of that earlier. Go and do it!	Has Jim seen a doctor about his like for cross dressing?	Terry gets tinsel wrapped by the Elves
The Inspector trys out a new hair gel!	"So now we're all done with our story again, lets just hope that next year it's not so inane. But now there is something to sing, as you know we're now at a very important part of our show. So take out your - WAIT FOR IT - sheets, get your voices in gear The 12 days of Christmas are just about here!"	Ending the evening with The 12 Days of Christmas and other Christmas songs

A big thank you to the photographers!

November 2006

	Do you think we've got enough??
	Thanks to for some great music and fun
Irish Stew & Guiness	The Stocklinch Sweep Stakes	Is that the winning horse, Henry?
	Singing & jigging
	Jigging & singing

A big thank you to the photographer!

Sunday 1 October 2006



	Thank you to the photographer for taking the photos.

We were really lucky with the weather!	A lot of people came to enjoy the day, buy some plants ...	... and to pick up some bargins from the White Elephant stall, famous for it's many interesting 'finds'.
The cake stall is always popular ...	... as is the book stall.	A 'nice cup of tea' always goes down quite well, even on a hot summers day.
Everybody was well entertained by the band.	'Sandwich board' shoing Stocklinch Tea towle that was for sale.	The Marjorettes looked rather good in their blue outfits against the green.
Strawberries & Cream ...	... with a cup of tea ...	... always goes down a treat!
After all that strawberries & cream, there were a lot of activities for everyone.	You could try your luck throughing coconuts.	How about having your face painted.
Get that goal!	And of course, ...	... a tug of war.

Many thanks to all who took part and made this such a splendid day
and to the photographer who took all these photographs!

Saturday 25 February 2006 at 7.45pm

The Hall is filling up ...	The Programme Welcome Songs - I Jazz sax The Stoney Lane Cats White Flag - Dido Sisters A visit from the council First half finale INTERVAL (15 mins)	... for this popular event!
If everybody is seated, then we can start.	The Village People - In the navy Raising for the Village Hall The Village People - Y.M.C.A. Songs II Barrel of Bricks At the Drop of Anohter Song Me old Dutch Grand finale!	Welcome!
Stocklinch's own 'Song bird'	Oh, that jazz ....	White Flag - Dido
The Stoney Lane Cats ...		... know how to enjoy life!
	The Sisters paying us a visit ...
... to sing some of ...	... their most famous ...	... songs.
And ... a visit from the council		More music!
'Climb Ev'ry Mountain'	Come on and sing-a-long ...	... and have a good time!
The Village People ...	... with 'In the Navy' ...	... got everybody going ...
... followed by ...		... Y.M.C.A. ...
"Young man, there's no need to feel down I said young man, pick yourself off the ground"	"I said young man, 'cause you're in a new town"	"There's no need to be unhappy Young man, there's a place you can go I said young man, when you're short on your dough"
"Young man, I was once in your shoes I said, I was down and out with the blues"	"I felt no man cared if I was alive I felt the whole world was so jive"	"That's when someone came up to me And said young man, take a walk up the street"
"There's a place there called the YMCA They can start you back on your way"	" It's fun to stay at the YMCA"
"Bring him home ..."	The story about an unfortunate ...	... building site worker.
"I'm a gnu—I'm a gnother gnu ...	... The g-nicest work of g-nature in the zoo I'm a gnu—how do you do? You really oughtta g-know w-who's w-who I'm a gnu—spelt G - N - U I'm not a camel or a kangaroo So let me introduce, I'm neither man nor moose Oh, g-no, g-no, g-no, I'm a gnu!"	"Have some Madera, me dear"
"Many of you southerners think we Northerners wear flat caps."	"So as not to disappoint - 'ere you are."	The inimitable couple.
They've been married for 40 years ...		... and it don't seem a day too long!
Grand finale!	Many thanks ...	... to all!